


We Are All Afraid

by blueberrytea



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: M/M, One Shot, force-bonding, space gays are gay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-12
Updated: 2016-01-12
Packaged: 2018-05-13 09:53:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,347
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5703349
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blueberrytea/pseuds/blueberrytea
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hux teaches Kylo about fear. Kylo teaches Hux about the Force. Something unexpected ensues.</p>
            </blockquote>





	We Are All Afraid

**Author's Note:**

> "That's not how the Force works!"  
> -everyone to me, probably
> 
> Written for ridingtogallifrey, who sent me a thing on tumblr about crushes and tantrums and Hux calling Kylo ‘Ben’. As usual, I apologize for any and all mistakes and I really hope this makes you smile, even though I didn’t follow the prompt all the way~ but here it is, finally!!

 

Hux had learned of Ren’s history a short time after they’d been introduced--Supreme Leader Snoke explained it in full to him, saying that if they were to work in tandem, large secrets would be only prove to be setbacks.

In truth, Hux thought nothing of Ren’s heritage on most days. The difference between Solo and his son was gaping, and Hux found it easier to simply know this fact, to be able to say the words instead of thinking about it too much or trying to comprehend. Besides, his associate wasn’t Ben Solo anymore. He was Kylo Ren.

Sometimes, however, Hux found that even though (surely) the best way to go about things was to maintain a distant and shallow relationship with Ren, he was...intrigued. The day he’d stumbled upon this phenomenon was the first time he witnessed one of Ren’s “outbursts.”

Ren had acquired a fractured wrist in training and Leader Snoke had banned him from leaving the base, concerned—or, as close to concerned as Leader Snoke could come—about his precious protégé injuring himself any further. Ren was, of course, furious when he discovered that the civilians the troops were setting out to capture were prominent leads in the search for a relic of the old Empire. Hux had been on his way to inform Ren of a meeting with Supreme Leader Snoke within the hour when he’d come across the very man he’d been seeking in his quarters, smashing his desk and chair. His lightsaber was nowhere to be seen (Hux supposes now that Leader Snoke had confiscated it) and his knuckles were thatched with red.

Hux had stood there in the doorway for a moment, looking on as Ren rode out his anger, before clearing his throat to make himself known. It took a few tries. When he finally did capture Ren’s attention, the Knight’s face was plain with a mixture of embarrassment, rage, pain, and, most peculiar of all, pure terror, which looked like it had manifested in Ren’s features since before Hux’s entry.

Hux was struck by this unguarded display of emotion, nearly blown backward from the power that shot through the Force, and found himself urging Ren to calm down.

“I don’t need your _guidance_ ,” Ren had remarked irritably. Hux got a grip on his actions, stepping away from the mess of a man now pooled on the red-speckled floor. He decided to move forward with business.

“Supreme Leader Snoke has requested our presence.” He spoke with no other intention, tone clear and authoritative.

“Very well,” Ren replied to the floor. Hux resisted the urge to shake his head disappointedly at the Knight. He sighed.

“Get up.” Ren squinted at Hux, traces of embarrassment still lingering on his face. Nevertheless, he obeyed, rising shakily to his feet and drawing himself to his full height. Hux gazed up at his unmasked face, trying with his meek Force sensitivity to find some answer for Ren’s rush of emotion. However, Ren’s shields were impenetrable with years of practice of hiding his thoughts. A tiny smirk appeared on Ren’s mouth, most likely a response to feeling Hux probe his defenses.

Hux wanted to inquire about the health of the other man, but found himself unable to force the words past his teeth. Ren inhaled as if to say something, but evidently decided not to. Instead, Hux felt a light brush at his own mind, an invitation. He hesitated, and then complied, lowering his weak shields skeptically.

**_He is not dead._ **

The intensity of this one mere thought slipping from Ren’s mind to his made lightening streak down to his knees, which gave out. Ren grabbed his arms reflexively, holding him up for a moment while he regained his balance.

“Did you…” Ren began. He looked like a child.

“Yes." Hux struggled to breathe. "Is that abnormal?”

“Yes.” The air Ren puffed onto his face was warm. “I’ve tried to before but it’s never…no one’s ever.” Hux swallowed in an attempt to get rid of a dry patch in his throat.

“He?” Hux inquired. “Do you mean Had Solo's son?” Ren exhaled in annoyance.

“I know you know.”

“I am aware of your knowing.” Hux spat. “Don't tell me you've been foolish enough to let your old life follow you like some pitiful dog.” Ren's eyes shifted as he drew back. Hux felt wariness and disappointment seeping from the other man, rushing to amend himself. "I... Are you called by the light?"

Ren looked distrustful. He let his hair fall in his face as he turned back to Hux and all at once Hux was met by the questioning touch of Ren’s consciousness and a cold spark of something in his stomach. Pushing the latter aside, he let Ren in bit by bit, bracing himself for whatever Ren was preparing to send along their little link.

He realized, as the images flowed bright and hard into him, that there could have been no adequate preparation.

Quite suddenly, Hux felt with the most rudimentary part of his being the struggle encased in Ren’s mind—a battle between dark and light. He saw and heard and tasted the world Ben—no, Kylo—no, _Ren_ —had grown up in, had learned everything in, had become human in. How it called to him, how it had _been_ calling to him, and how he was barely resisting the urge to answer it. How he was afraid every time he lashed out in anger, afraid of hurting someone and afraid of harboring that fear. How he was afraid of disappointment. How he was afraid of Leader Snoke. How he was afraid of Hux.

_Afraid of Hux._

_Ren is afraid of me._

Immediately something dropped, mental walls that Hux hadn’t even been aware were up.

Ren shivered visibly at the might of Hux's thoughts, his own fears that scuttled and slithered and hissed. Hux watched Ren sift through everything Hux had to offer, watched his brow furrow in determined understanding.

“You’re afraid,” he murmured, entranced.

“We are all afraid,” Hux whispered, hearing his voice echo in his own ears. Ren looked not at him but into him, wonder sprinkled over every line and crease on his face.

Though it was feeble, Hux had never felt anything as powerfully consuming as the bond that now stretched between him and the Knight. He was still in a dream state, prodding it and exploring it when he came to realization with a jolt.

“Leader Snoke will be wondering what became of us,” Hux stated. Dread slowly spread over Kylo’s face.

 _Shit,_ he said in Hux’s head. Hux wasn’t sure if he’d intended to.

“Leader Snoke will not appreciate tardiness,” Kylo breathed, hurriedly making his way over to a pedestal to retrieve his mask.

“Wait,” Hux blurted. Kylo slowed his motions, turning to face Hux. Hux cleared his throat nervously. “Leave it.”

The Force crackled, electric, in the room.

Kylo returned his helmet to its stand and His caught a fraction of a smile on his lips before turning into the hall.

He walked until Kylo caught up with him.

~*~

Thunder from ten thousand skies rolled within him as he took out the control panel with his lightsaber, the familiar disgust with his soft ways and his impediments mixing with the blinding agony of the map to Luke Skywalker having slipped from his grasp once more.

“ _Ren!_ ” he heard from a voice behind him. Hux’s now powerful influence on his mind made him to turn and face the other man. A few terrified-looking officers surrounded him, but Kylo paid them no mind.

Hux strode over to Kylo, grabbing his collar in feigned hostility.

 _I’m here,_ he spoke in Kylo’s mind. _It’s all right. Speak to me._

 _The droid escaped. And it had assistance._ Hux looked almost sympathetic for a moment.

_Are you feeling the call?_

_Yes._

_Are you afraid?_

_Yes._ Hux loosened his grip, stepping back slightly. He looked Kylo up and down, mouth curling down hard but eyes staying soft.

“Don’t be,” He reprimanded. And Kylo felt himself obeying.

_Don’t be._


End file.
